I don't know what to call this entry.

Merriam-Webster dictionary defines vulnerable as such:

capable of being physically or emotionally wounded

I've given this 'way of being' a lot of thought recently. The Merriam-Webster duo certainly provide an interesting definition as well. I'm not arguing with it, but I do question the nature of how it plays into our lives. How do we become capable of being wounded? If I had a choice, I'd say, I don't want to be wounded - I don't want any part of vulnerability and what it has to offer. Count me out. Which is exactly the choice I've made in many instances in my life. Almost so that I have not experienced an emotional wound in a lengthy amount of time. I had no idea, until I looked it up that is, that the Merriam-Webster duo defined us as "capable" of vulnerability, yet all the while, capable or not, I have consciously made decisions that have kept me from harm's way.

All in all, a seemingly great choice. Avoiding wounds is a human survival technique, is it not? Without question, it is. Even so, what if I consciously made the choice never to be made vulnerable? I suppose that would make way for an unquestionably safe lifestyle. Particularly, emotionally. Thus, it would make perfect sense to say, I will not enter into a relationship, for fear of being made vulnerable. The alternative, however reluctantly, is choosing to be single, in an attempt to avoid the emotional instability altogether.

What a crock of *h%t. Right?

In my experience, and ultimately, the attempt at avoidance, merely exposes a vulnerable state of wanting exactly what the effort is avoiding in the first place. The wound of longing is strong, if not, just as strong as the aftermath of a failed relationship. Believe me, this has been tried and tested, and believe me, this is a long, and grueling chosen road...

Capable. It's an interesting word choice. How about inevitable or unavoidable? Perhaps making an addendum to the definition would be a good idea. I suppose we're all very well capable of being vulnerable. To whatever degree though, if the end goal is to live a full life, leaving room for an unavoidable emotional and/or physical wound is a tenable theory, and in this lifetime, probably the most propitious way to reach your intended desires.

This quote wraps up my verbose entry in a nutshell:

We're never so vulnerable than when we trust

someone - but paradoxically, if we cannot trust,

neither can we find love or joy.
~Walter Anderson